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Find your Confidence

Find your Confidence

There are three constants in life: Death, paying the tax man, and the fact that scrolling through Insta and seeing people with ultra-toned bodies going on #wanderlust #travelgoals trips will def make you feel like sh*t. (No matter how awesome you are.) I

And that’s not just me being miserable; Research actually shows that the more time people spend on Facebook, the lower their self-esteem. But instead of just deleting all your social media accounts (where else would you find hilarious movie memes?) we asked local Winchester show girl and Burlesque teacher, 41 year old Emma Hayfield from @legupdance for tips on how we can all improve our body confidence, what ever our shape or size. Try considering these 5 tactics next time you find yourself in a confidence crisis and double-tapping your way into a doom spiral.

burlesque in Winchester

Find a Workout that Works for You

Science agrees that exercise is a certified mood booster. Once the endorphins kick-in (the happy hormones) there’s no room for low self esteem. The tricky part is staying motivated. If the gym doesn’t keep you engaged, branch out and find a workout that really appeals to you. This way, you’re exercising purely for the love of the doing the sport and not to attain a specific weight or look.

Cut Comparing

We tend to assume that some issues around body image are age specific. But I think people would be surprised to know that more often that not, the younger you are, the more hang ups you have. Also, in our image-driven society it can be hard not to compare ourselves unfavourably to the “ideals” that surround us. We are often still subjected to unrealistic images of what older women should look like. When body anxieties pop into your head, focus on a part you like – it’s good to have one ‘prepped’ – and acknowledge this positive. Or challenge yourself – ask ‘Would I say this to a friend?’ If not, why would you say it to yourself?

Have a Zero Hate Policy

Don’t tolerate remarks you find offensive. Ever. From anyone. Including yourself. Sure sometimes people make mistakes and put their foot in their mouth or something unintentionally comes across the wrong way. But we should never tolerate cruel remarks or jibes. Whether it be on our looks or personality, financial status, race, sexuality, fertility…whatever! If someone says something hurtful, call them out on it. If it keeps happening get rid of them like an old pair or tatty knickers… you don’t need that in your life. Especially not from yourself! Shut that mean-girl inside your head down. Life’s tough enough without that type of negativity.

Reward your Body

How often have you treated yourself to a massage or spa break and thought “I must do this more often”? But it’s easy to build in simple, daily pampering rituals that will allow you to reconnect with and spoil your body, look after your skin, and feel instantly more confident.

Emma Hayfield - Burlesque in Winchester

Shift your Perspective

Remember something you hate about yourself, may be a feature someone else finds very desirable.

Despite media pressure and images, what most individuals find attractive is still…individual! I always hated my nipples, i have huge areolas and thought they were ugly and that men only tolerated looking at them, but probably secretly hated them. After all, that’s not what i saw in films and nudie mags back in the 90s! Well blow me down, after years of self-loathing and shame, a recent love interest took one look at them and said “oh wow! I love that, I think its so sexy on a woman.” The point is, we all have different ideas of what is attractive, no matter what the media tries to shove down our throats. You just never know, that hated wobbly bit may just be someone else’s fantasy!

Believe in Yourself

How often do you tell yourself there is no point in trying to lose weight as you can never stick to it? Belief is a powerful thing and can have a huge impact on whether we achieve our goals. Maybe this attitude stops you making the effort going forward because you are always doubting your ability to succeed. Imposing a lack of belief on yourself can really get in the way of you making changes. It can even become an excuse for not taking action and an easy way out from having to actually commit to a goal.

Burlesque in Winchester

It’s time to take the bull by the horns and stop limiting yourself through self-doubt. You have the ability to achieve as much as others and don’t let anyone tell you differently!

Leg Up Dance will be starting a new course of beginners Burlesque classes on the 12th of September at 8pm – 9pm Unit 12 Winnall Valley Road, Winchester SO23 0LD.  Join us with Emma to find your confidence. See @legupdance on Instagram for more details.